Sunday, February 7, 2010

Sunday, Feb. 6th

I'm back. It's been a long 2 or so weeks. I've been in a bad, bad place but I think I've emerged. I'm done with winter. I want some nice weather. I keep asking myself, why do I live here??????
I feel my body is telling me to get my shit together. I've been waking up every morning with a sore back. I know it's because I haven't been exercising and all I do when I get home is lay around. This isn't good for me but I don't have the strength or drive to do anything else.

Yesterday was especially challenging. We've had a lot of days without sun and I was missing it. Today is better. I walked on the treadmill for about 40 minutes and then I just got back from a walk outside. The weather is better today. A little bit crisp but the sun is SHINNING! I'm really missing it.

My goals have changed a bit. I need to exercise. How I'm going to do more of this I'm not sure but I do KNOW that I really do love going for a walk. I don't need any equipment, special clothes, etc. I just want to get out and walk. Today after being on the treadmill and then going outside my back was already feeling better. I can't walk as fast as I used to but I'm okay with that. Baby steps right.

I may fall off the wagon again but I'm not going to beat myself up over it. I knew this was going to be hard and it is.

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